Though this is a private case, and maintaining the rule of confidentiality, I wont mention the demographics of this case. But definitely would like to share the insights of this case.
My own mind blowing experience….
Being a male dominated society, though we talk of equality and not to mention, we do see women striving and at every stage being successful, but still cannot forget the underlying perception, that it is a male dominated society.In every area we do see women now leading, but in one area, where this fact has been very rarely noticed is, ” The Indian marriage System”, rather “Arranged marriage system”
As it goes, even if the girl is highly educated, independent, but when it comes to arranged marriage, we still see the boys family taking the upper hand. Whether we say it is because of the customs or societal pressure, but it is happening.
In a similar situation, I came across this girl, who very confidently refused a proposal when it was at the “D” day stage. Though she was confident, but heart of heart she was a little scared.
She thus approached me, just to share her thoughts and getting an insight. I as a counselor, did nothing more than just hearing her out, which helped her resolve her issue, rather her dilemma. While speaking of the situation and hurdles she was facing, she herself realized that getting into the nuptial bond, would have affected her more, rather than breaking the marriage at this stage. Only by speaking out her mind, she was able to see a clearer picture, which strengthened her belief that she was right in calling off the wedding. Though breaking off a wedding especially when the “D” day is near, is tough, one can go through emotional turmoil, here is where I just needed to be Empathetic to her. Together we charted a new plan a new way of seeing things and how in future she can deal with her life henceforth.
The point of emphasis here is, that just by talking, one can come with their own solution, which is self generated, so no point of disagreement….